What a Week It’s Been!

Kelly Autism, It's a Tink Thing Leave a Comment

Phew! I need a large drink and a few minutes’ peace to try to get my head around this week!

It began with us finally receiving the amended EHCP draft that we should have had weeks ago. Still no confirmation on a school place, but it does at least name our preferred school in the draft. There is a lot of new information to be added in too. I have tried to get hold of the relevant person at the local authority to find out what’s happening, but so far, she has not been available to take my call…

And then on Tuesday… Tink turned 5! I still can’t believe it’s five years since she arrived in our lives and turned it upside down. We actually celebrated with family on the Sunday as it was easier, so her birthday was spent as normal – nursery and then ICAN club in the evening. She was completely nonplussed when everyone sang ‘Happy Birthday’ to her though!

However, what was not normal was that Tink chose her birthday to begin toilet training!

Yes, she woke up with a totally dry nappy, so I tried her on her potty, where we quickly found out it’s far too small now (being designed for 2 or 3 year olds, not tall 5 year olds) as she proceeded to cover the floor…  She used the loo before going to nursery, so I let them know it might be worth trying her. She even happily let me take her to the (strange) toilet at ICAN club! The following day, she wasn’t feeling too good thanks to her usual tummy issues, so I kept her at home. After she finally achieved some relief late morning, I decided to bite the bullet and really try with the toileting while I had the opportunity. And she hasn’t looked back! She’s been fantastic! Dry nappies every morning, staying dry whilst at nursery, using the loo with some coaxing and bribery incentive (chocolate buttons).  And today she actually said to me, “I need a wee wee”!!

We are in something of a state of shock! That not only has she suddenly gained awareness and control of bladder urges, after showing absolutely no interest even just last week, but that she chose her 5th birthday to do it! There’s still a long way to go, but what an amazing start! It felt very strange buying girly pants instead of nappies this week!

Tuesday wasn’t all fab news, however. On picking Tink up from Nursery, her teacher came out to speak to us to let us know that Tink is struggling in the afternoons, and even a little in the mornings. I was a little miffed that we were given this not-so-happy update on her birthday. She’s not quite doing a full day yet, but she doesn’t have one-to-one support in the afternoons, and the fact that she’s becoming anxious and upset and that they are unable to distract her out of it just shows that she really does need it. I asked what her teacher thought was best, but she’s not keen to cut Tink’s hours back, because she needs to get used to doing longer days for when she does eventually go to school. It just doesn’t feel right that she’s there, all upset most afternoons when she could be with me. I feel like taking her out completely at the moment – maybe it would bump her up the waiting list for a school place too?

So, a real mixed week! Tink seems to have changed so much in such a short space of time. She’s really growing up. Her speech is developing all the time and she’s coming out with more and more complex sentences. Her play is changing, with more imaginative play coming in and her independence is growing too. But school is still an issue and her anxiety is not diminishing despite everyone’s best efforts.

We’ll keep on keeping on….!


Kelly is a mother of two – her son H and daughter Tink. H is home educated, Tink is autistic. Kelly is a self-employed Virtual Assistant… Life is busy!

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